Hair loss happens. It happens a lot.
The American Hair Loss Association estimates that two out of every three men will start to lose at least some of their hair by the time they’re 35. When they’re 50, around 85 percent will have significant thinning.
And when the hair starts to go, well, there aren’t many guys who go, “Oh cool, just what I was hoping would happen.”
In 2013, researchers in Berlin conducted a major study of the psychosomatic effects of hair loss, and concluded that even minor balding could lead to “an enormous emotional burden with low self-confidence, impaired quality of life, and even psychological disorders.”
And consider this distressing statistic, from a 2009 survey conducted by the International Society of Hair Restoration Surgery. Almost 60% of guys would rather have a full head of hair than money or friends.
That’s right, living alone on the street without a friend in the world would be fine, as long as you’re not bald.
What in the actual hell, guys?
It’s amazing how far people will go to save their hair. They’ll spend thousands of dollars on supposed cures, or submit to hair restoration surgery—we’re looking at you, Donald Trump and whatever that is on your head —or try drugs that might be doing more harm than good.
In place of all those extreme measures, there’s a better way to treat baldness, a way that will save you money and time and endless stress.
Are you ready for it?
Just let it happen.
Go bald. And don’t give a shit.
Don’t believe that’s possible? We talked to four accomplished, well-traveled men with one thing in common: They’re all bald—in fact, they all started losing their hair before the age of 30—and they all don’t care.
How’d they reach that magical place of acceptance? Let’s find out.
Hair Can Be a Pain In the Ass
Do you ever look at guys with elaborate quaffs covered in tons of “product” and wonder how much time they spend worrying about the dead protein on their domes?
That doesn’t happen to a guy with a bald head. His morning routine is wash, walk, and forget.
Dan Madigan is a successful screenwriter in Los Angeles. He started losing his hair while employed as a bouncer at tough Boston nightclubs and working out as a boxer, powerlifter, and wrestler. He says going bald was a relief.
“It has its pluses,” he says of his now hairless head. “In some ways, it frees you up. You feel streamlined. When I started to lose my hair in my late 20s, I had a few months of angst. Then I realized that all of my favorite men of action were bald.”
Leave Vanity to the Boys
Vanity and narcissism are unattractive qualities in anyone, but their deal killers for men who aspire to experience a full life.
If you have nothing better to do than worry about your hairline, maybe you’ve got a little too much free time on your hands.
Related: The Best Haircuts for Guys with Thinning Hair
Ronain Portis grew up poor and angry in Scotland. In his own words, he was “skinny and was going bald young. I had a chip on my shoulder, and my choices were coal mines, lumber yards, or ship wreckers.”
He didn’t have time to worry about his hair, he says. “I went on to serve in the Scots Guards. I traveled the world. I was a bodyguard for some of the biggest names in rock n’ roll. I’m a five handicap.”
Once you’re busy living, Portis says, “You don’t worry about the top of your head.”
Find a Bald Role Model
For all the worrying men do about losing their hair, you’d think more of them would remember that some very badass and successful men are and were comfortably bald.
Like who? Like Tyrese Gibson, Vin Diesel, Billy Zane, Taye Diggs, Stanley Tucci, Pitbull, Mark Strong, Jason Statham, Matt Lauer, Isaac Hayes, Mark Messier, Andre Agassi, Albert Pujols, Stone Cold Stone Austin, Marvelous Marvin Hagler, Lex Luthor, Brian Urlacher, Bruce Willis, Jason Statham, Evander Holyfield, and a huge chunk of the NBA, including Michael Jordan.
Can’t a man find some peace in that company?
Peter Woodke is a veteran attorney in the Boise, Idaho area. He saw his hair going early, but he found some role models out in the world to erase any trauma.
“As my hair was thinning further, I realized I knew guys through work who are bald and are highly motivated individuals,” he says. “I figure they haven’t it let it affect them, so why should it with me?”
Take Care of the Rest of You
Losing hair is often beyond control. It just happens for a myriad of natural biological reasons.
But there are countless other factors in how a man presents himself that are entirely his responsibility.
Paul Moynan is a rock of a man. After serving multiple tours in Middle East combat with the Royal Marines, he keeps himself in top shape.
As he flies back in forth from London to Dubai to New York to North Africa for the maritime firm he leads, he’s always dressed to the nines. The women who run into him on a daily basis are not worried that he went bald years ago.
“If you’re looking healthy, if you’re well dressed and you present yourself professionally, there isn’t a woman alive who’s going to look past you because of your hair,” he says.
Forget the surgeries and drugs. Save that money for a life adventure. Something that matters.
Don’t bother covering it up with hats, and please, for the love of all that’s holy, don’t attempt a combover.
Moynan and every other bald and proud man we interviewed for this story agreed on one thing: Women will always choose the smoothly bald man over the insecure weed who’s desperately hiding his head from the world.
It’s just not what a man does.